By: Evan Marc Katz, Author of “Why You’re Still Single: Thing Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not to Get Mad”
If you’re like most Americans, you recently made a New Year’s resolution.
If you’re like me, you’ve already broken it. (Sorry gym – I’m still sleepy at 7am!)
But there are some things in life with which we have no choice but to be resolute – and that is in our search for love, companionship and great sex.
So, without further ado, behold, your Ten Dating Resolutions for 2010.
1) Make an effort – What gives you the greater opportunity to find love: one date a year, or one date a week? Putting yourself out there is imperative to your success.
2) Don’t take things personally – There are some men you’re not going to like. There will be some men who don’t like you. That’s how it goes. Don’t get too derailed when a promising prospect disappears. Every single relationship fails…until the one that doesn’t.
3) Do nothing – Once you’ve made contact with him, it’s his job to follow up with you. You can reply to his calls, his emails, and his texts. You can say yes to him when he wants to make plans. But don’t initiate. A guy who’s crazy about you will let you know thru his efforts.
4) Stay open – My sister moved cross country and got engaged to a bald man she met online. One friend married a blue collar guy with a huge heart. Another married a man 15 years older. Drop your fantasy of how it “should” look. True love rarely fits your original ideal.
5) Be positive – You may hate dating. You may be exasperated with men. You may have experienced tons of cheaters, liars, and fools. And yet some woman falls in love every day. And Positive Polly is much more loveable than Negative Nellie.
6) Don’t try to change men – Men do what they want. If you don’t like what they’re doing, then leave. What you usually do is to stay and attempt to mold him into your idea of the perfect man. Don’t bother. He’ll resent you for trying; you’ll resent him for failing.
7) Change your focus – Choose kindness over lust. Consistency over brilliance. It’s not that it’s wrong to desire a smart, hot, rich guy; it’s that it doesn’t matter how great he is if you’re not being treated the way you deserve.
Be humble – recognize that while you sit across the lunch table dissecting the many things your date doesn’t have, he can do the exact same thing to you.
9) Forgive the ignorance – Men have no idea how to date you, but believe it or not, they’re doing their best. Forgive them when they talk too much or start to brag or get nervous. They just want you to like them.
10) Give yourself a break – Dating’s difficult enough. No point in beating yourself up – especially when you’re doing everything else above perfectly.
Evan Marc Katz is a dating coach and the author of “Why You’re Still Single”. Learn to create your own success in dating by picking up his free eBook, “The 5 Massive Mistakes You’re Making in Your Love Life” at www.evanmarckatz.com/newsletter.html
Source: www.itsjustlunchblog.com
Posted by TeezYou Date: Thursday, January 14, 2010
Categories: Relationships
Tags: Date, dating, new year, new year's, resolution
Ever wonder why some potential partners seem
so fabulous when we begin dating them and then turn into total
duds? First of all, people look so good at the
beginning of relationships because they are
putting…
Source: shine.yahoo.com
Posted by TeezYou Date: Thursday, January 7, 2010
Categories: Relationships
Tags: 2010, Date, dating, superdate, tips
The smallest and most unexpected things can shape the course and dynamics of a relationship. Ultimately, it can either improve or limit your success with women.
Even an online text message (AIM, MSN, Yahoo) or offline one can spoil the dynamics if carelessly conducted. Just because your phone plan permits you to send out unlimited text messages, or seduces you with ‘happy hours’, don’t consider yourself playing it smart and getting your money’s worth by clogging up your date’s inbox space. This is not a real estate game.
Nowadays, I see a lot of guys, especially with a Blackberry devices, BB’ing their girls incessantly like there’s no tomorrow. What they don’t realize is that a lot of fluff talk goes down, and that the compounding effect inevitably manifests as negative impact.
Keeping in touch with people is cool, but constant texting will eventually kill your mystery level and chew away your private life. When this happens, don’t blame the recipient but yourself.
With that said, I’d now like to introduce to you my 5 rules of engagement for off and online text messaging.
Follow this simple guideline, and I can guarantee that you will increase your perceived value and attraction level simply by pushing-buttons.
Rule #1: Have a date-oriented end-purpose.; and that one single purpose should be to use bridge into your next date.
Don’t just text to ask “What are doing?” or “What are you up to?” without any follow-up text to set up for a date after.
Suggest that she joins you for xxxxx next week, state how it’ll benefit her, and be enthusiastic about it.
Rule #2: When you can, communicate on a level that stimulates a feeling of excitement and anticipation. Messages like…
“Guess what?”
“I got something amazing to share with you.”
These types of lines all elicit anticipatory responses.
Now, to keep your conversation dynamic exciting, follow rule 3.
Rule #3: Keep your texts short, succinct, playful, and flirty. Avoid punching in long messages. 2-3 lines or less would be preferable. Usually, a round of text exchanging shouldn’t exceed over 8-10 messages (including yours and hers)
Rule #4: Attitude of a tease. Try to recall something silly/embarrassing she recently said, and talk about it. This is a great way to maintain a level of sexual tension.
“You were amazing at basketball today. Averaging zero points per game. For some reason, why do I find that sexy?”
Rule #5: Keep your message open-ended and call for emotional involvement. To keep the text conversation buoyant, she must be involved.
Ask questions that require a response every time you send a text message. I always end my messages with a question etc.
In terms of response, make sure it triggers a side of her emotions. The last thing you want is for her to respond indifferently.
Avoid however, asking nosy questions which prompts a negative response.
For example,
“When are you going to sleep?”
“What will you do tomorrow?”
“When do I see you again?”
As you notice, a woman wouldn’t exactly be thrilled to reply to those questions. Instead, it only makes you seem more desperate, lonely, and meddlesome.
Remember, always keep a woman guessing to whether you are interested in her or not.
So there you have it, my 5 rules on text-messaging. Never go over-the-top, and try cast a restraining order to volleying messages back and forth like it’s a sport.
Gentlemen, have a great day, and go easy on the calls too.
Technorati Tags: Anticipation, Blackberry, Estate Game, Excitement, Fluff, Happy Hours, Inbox, Ing, Mystery, Negative Impact, Private Life, Pushing Buttons, Recipient, Rule 1, Rules Of Engagement, Smart Money, Text Message, Text Messages, Text Messaging, Texting
Source: absolutedatingtips
Posted by TeezYou Date: Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Categories: Relationships
Tags: Date, text messaging, texting women
